Seattle Freeze

I've been banging my head up against a social ice cube as it seems ever since moving to Seattle a few months ago.

Recently I discovered this phrase called the Seattle Freeze, a phrase that describes a local public consensus that Seattle and or it's outlying areas are generally not friendly, asexual, introverted, socially aloof, clickish or strictly divided through its social classes, thus making the city/ area difficult to make social connections on all levels (thank you UrbanDictionary).

It's not that Seattle is not friendly... on the surface, Seattlites are the friendliest people that I have ever met...

They will hold doors for you.
Offer to take your shopping cart.
Make a joke about how long the line at Trader Joe's is.
Smile and wave at you during traffic.
But... it's all painfully impersonal.

Now, I consider myself to be very outgoing, have a good personality, and enjoy meeting new people and trying new things. The local people are polite, but are generally closed. They're easy to get along in day-to-day interactions. However, the attitude of "Have a nice... somewhere else" which dominates this city makes it nearly impossible to make friends.

Every Friday I get asked, "Oh hey! What're you doing this weekend?" And I respond, "Umm... not too sure, just moved here a few months ago..." trying to not act too desperate hoping for an invitation to do something... ANYTHING! The extent of the conversation finishes after they give me a string of restaurants, festivals, or a new coffee shop to try and tell me that they'll see me on Monday. Oh wait... Can we friends?! No? Damnit.

Seattlites say, "Let's do something sometime..." which typically means, "Let's never do anything ever...." I've found that whenever I try and ask people to actually go DO something, the looks I get in return are just blank stares or the face that displays the emotion that they have just heard the most ridiculous thing in the world. What?! You ACTUALLY want to do something?!

People here don't like or dislike you, they're completely indifferent. Maybe it's because of the 9 months of gray skies and perpetual spitting mist, the massive Microsoft and Boeing technie introverts, the smallness of Seattle, having about 50% of the population that lived in the outlying suburbs/cities and have not branched outside their childhood friends, or maybe the fact that norms of social interaction just don't pertain to Seattle.

Seattle has transplants from all over the United States and I've found other fellow transplants from Colorado, Oregon, California, and Arizona that have experienced the cold shoulder of the Seattle Freeze. Some that have stayed here long enough have lost their willingness to branch out to other people and just hide away during the gray season and they seem content, but inwardly depressed.

So how do I as a new person in Seattle make new friends? Good question... I'll get back to you on that if I'm ever able to surpass this massive glacier that's in front of me.